Before I start my review I need to up front state that as a Canadian it may be hard to keep my bias in check. Now that I have that off my chest, I loved this episode. This week we find out that Robin has a mall phobia and everyone has an opinion on what the secret reason is. Marshall thinks its a secret marriage while Barney is sure she was a Canadian porn star and the only way to settle it definitively is with a slap bet judged by the one and only slap bet commissioner. In between lies about Canadian husbands running off to Hong Kong, tricky laweryering, some legal research and lots of Canadian accent “ouwt and abouwt” and “eh” jokes we also get some great slaps.
But all of this is just building to the greatest ending of any sitcom in recent memory – a true homage to Canada’s favourite 80’s mall pop celebrity, Alanis (yes, she that was to become Alanis Morrisette). Robin’s secret is that she was once Robin Sparkles mall pop star extraodinaire and like Barney I could watch her video again and again. Go to CBS.com and you can too. In the meantime here’s a transcription of the song from TV Guide’s Michelle Heller.
Let’s go to the mall, everybody, ha. Go!
Come on Jessica, come on Tori
Let’s go to the mall,
You won’t be soh-ry.
Put on your jelly bracelets
And your cool graffiti coat.
Having fun at the mall
Is what it’s all a-boot.
I haven’t done my homework yet
And you know how my parents get.
But I don’t care
‘Cause all my friends are gonna be there.
Everybody come and play.
Throw every last care away.
Let’s go to the mall (giggle) today.
There’s this boy I like.
Met him at the food court.
He’s got hair like Gretzsky
And he does jumps on his skateboard.
I hope he asks me out.
Takes me to my favorite spot.
It’ll be just him and me.
(But don’t forget the robot.)
Dad says I’m too young to date
But baby I don’t want to wait.
That’s OK, I’m gonna rock your body anyway.
I’m gonna rock your body till Canada Day.
I went to the mall with a couple of friends.
I had a whole week’s allowance to spend.
I want hoop earrings and a Benetton shirt.
I came here to shop and I came here to flirt.
I turned around and who should I see
But Prime Minister Brian Mulroney.
He said, “Young lady, I don’t approve”
So I had to get down and bust [totally indecipherable].
Avi’s Episode Rating: A+